Some work frustrations can have negative consequences on the life of those who suffer them, but also on their family. Conflicts arise in these situations, for example triggered by the lack of money and by the partner who does not want to work.
It is in unfavorable times that the true personality and attitude of the people we have at our side can be seen. In this case it is important to encourage them to find a good solution as quickly as possible.
We are going to give you some tips on this in this article.
My partner doesn’t want to work, what do I do?
If your partner does not want to work absolutely, it is important that you talk to him or her to make the situation clear. In some cases it is also necessary to consult a psychologist, especially if the negativity is due to past trauma.
Also keep the following in mind:
1. Be patient
Knowing that our partner spends all day at home, without even making an attempt to find work, is certainly irritating. However, it is necessary to remain calm and avoid discussions. It is evident that it is not a question of a choice at the table, but a problem of wounded self-esteem.
It is necessary to give him time so that he can recover his energy, without ever losing sight of his reactions. Typically, a partner who doesn’t want to work is often in a bad mood or nervous. In reality it feels like a burden that does not contribute to the running of the house and this affects its dignity.
2. Identify the real cause
Although complicated, problems need to be solved within the couple and talking is the only way to find a solution. One has to look for why this person doesn’t want to work anymore.
In some cases, the difficulty of finding a job, whether for reasons of age, studies or acquired experience, leads to depression. Indeed, it is important to understand what is happening and, as we said, to ask for help from the outside.
It cannot be ruled out the possibility that the partner is in a comfortable situation and does not intend to leave their comfort zone. In these cases it is important to be peremptory and make him understand how irresponsible his behavior is.
3. Reassign homework
If he doesn’t want to work, staying indoors is not the solution. Since he does not work outside, it is important that he does it indoors. Agree with him or her a series of tasks to be shared between you.
That way, he’ll keep his mind busy and he’ll feel like he’s doing something worthwhile. He may also need it to understand how difficult it is to keep the house tidy.
4. Motivate and value strengths
The best way to motivate a person to work is to strengthen their self-esteem with compliments and affection. We can help you prepare an original resume or comment on job vacancies, without applying pressure.
This is a good opportunity to show that nothing is impossible, although it is not easy. A good piece of advice would be to try new jobs and go for small goals.
It is worth remembering that, beyond the material aspect, work is an activity that can help create a person’s self-esteem and identity. Many describe it as an “uplifting” activity.
5. Evaluate the consequences on family performance
Little by little it is important to start talking about the consequences of this moment of crisis on the family. On the one hand, it is necessary to make hypotheses about a new job, on the other hand there is the need to limit expenses in order not to incur debts.
The important thing is to make plans while maintaining a positive attitude, for example by carrying out actions with temporary effects, easily reversible. Visualizing the effects of your decision in practice allows for greater flexibility.
What if my partner doesn’t want to work and doesn’t care?
There are also people who have no desire to work. They are comfortable and happy even if they are financially dependent on the partner. They take on the role of children to all intents and purposes.
If this is your case, it is likely that you will need psychological support from a professional. And if there is no improvement or you see no effort to achieve it, moving away from this person may be the best choice for you.