Sometimes it’s not easy. Educating adolescent children requires patience and emotional intelligence, in order to transmit the values and limits suitable for making them grow up mature and responsible.
Below we give you 3 tips in this regard, so that they can be useful in that delicate phase, which is the growth and development of teenage children .
Tips for educating adolescent children
1. Offer them new rights, but also duties
Normally, girls are always a little earlier and it is they who, when they reach 11 or 12 years, begin to have greater needs. Boys, on the other hand, take a little longer to mature.
It is usually around the age of 13 that, suddenly and without knowing how, they become more stubborn, proud and often have inexplicable reactions.
They are growing up, they are entering the world of adults with their feet still as children, and it is not easy. Think of them as a little hormonal and personal chaos in which they define themselves little by little.
They need learning opportunities, they demand more rights and freedoms without objectively seeing whether their actions are risky or not.
The best thing to do is to keep a balance with the “rights-duties” theme. You can allow them to go up to the seventh end as long as they have done all their homework. The important thing is that they return home at the appointed time and, in case they come back late, they must lose some privileges.
The teenager must learn that life is full of norms and demands, even for adults. Things don’t fall from the sky; adults work to earn in order to feed, dress, make their children live.
Therefore, adolescents are asked to be responsible for their studies and their actions. Remember, too, that if you set standards, they need to be strict. Don’t forgive things every other day, because otherwise they will lose respect for you.
2. To educate in a positive way: first the refueling than the sanction
There are parents who make the mistake of constantly sanctioning their teenagers. Reproaches, arguments, negative reinforcements… a balance must be maintained. Let’s take an example: they fail an exam, they come home with low marks and we blame them for how lazy they have been and that they will not achieve anything in life.
You don’t have to do it. We will awaken negative feelings, distrust and low self-esteem in them. Ask what happened and trust them. Tell them that you trust them and that you know that next time they will pass the matter because they are able to make it.
When they make a mistake, teach them how to do better, but don’t denigrate them, don’t criticize them. Offer them strategies and trust instead of constant sanctions. It’s the best thing.
3. Teenage children: privilege good communication and trust
Always try to find some time to spend with your teenager and ask him / her how the day went. Don’t judge them for what they do or stop doing. As a parent you have to guide and this is achieved through constant dialogue and trust.
Avoid that your child is the typical teenager always closed in his room with his PC and his music, who only goes out to eat or to meet with friends. Prevent them from isolating themselves by promoting shared activities to do at home from an early age.
When you sit down at the table, turn off the television and talk. Find out about their tastes, their friends, the person they like … encourage them to share things with you calmly. The ideal is that they know they can find support in you, never an enemy who only criticizes and does not help.
Listen to them, orient them, be their parents, but also friends. Set limits when you have to and offer rights when they show you that you deserve them with maturity and responsibility.
In conclusion, we know that educating a teenage child is not easy, that none of us have the perfect parenting handbook. However, we assure you that with optimism, love and will, you can grow mature and responsible people capable of being autonomous in life.
Happy people who know that to get things you have to strive, that to have good friends and a partner you have to know how to respect and understand others. Emotional intelligence is always a good perspective to build on.
We conclude by telling you one important thing: it is necessary that both the father and the mother agree in the education of their children. Same values and same intentions.